The current story arc begins at Strip 197

July 28, 2003

So let's talk politics!

As a rule, I try to keep politics out of my strip. I inject a bit of it if and only if I think it will make a good gag. But for the most part, I don't. And I get irritated at comics that do. I read comics to be entertained and given a laugh, not to be preached at.

However, the news section is an entirely different matter!

So, first off, you should know I'm a Social Liberal, Fiscal Conservative. I can justify this stance with the following simple scenerio:

Let's say you have a small clothing shop. You have two employees: John Ashcroft and Michael Moore.

For those of you living in a box, John Ashcroft is our Attorney General and probably the most conservative person put in a position of power since the 1800s, and who is so mindlessly conservative that he had people put a sheet over the statue of Lady Justice because he considered her "improperly dressed". Michael Moore is a famous spittle-emitting liberal grandstander who is more or less against anything that the government is for, regardless of what it is.

Now, you have two positions to fill in your store. You need one person out on the floor, greeting and helping customers, and you need another manning the cash register. Who do you put where?

If I'm the manager, I'll have Michael Moore be the salesman, and John Ashcroft work the till. Moore, the screaming liberal, has a great tolerance of social differences and accepts all customers as equal. He wants to help everyone, regardless of if they deserve help or not. Ashcroft, on the till, can be counted on to squeeze every penny, and will hear nothing of extending credit or accepting expired coupons.

If you reverse those positions, you will go out of business. Ashcroft, out on the sales floor, will turn away customers who are black, jewish, gay, whatever. Also, he will refuse to sell any clothing he considers too revealing, and will probably complain that some of the mannequins don't have clothes on. Moore, on the till, will take money out of it and give it to the homeless people outside. He will do this without clearing it with me, the manager. When I complain, he'll call me heartless and say I'm an oppressor (cause I'm telling him what to do), an elitist (cause I won't help bums), and a racist (because he'll show me stats and charts showing that while 15% of the population is black, 15.0001% of the homeless population is black, and therefore I'm targeting a black demographic).

So how about you? Where would you place the workers at Ashcroft and Moore's Clothiers?

-ATW